I don't want sympathy. I most definitely do not want pity.
I just need to get it all out there.
My recent blog posts have been about life handing you a lemon….
I have used various takes on this cliché to fit our current situation.
Well here is another one.
When it rains it pours.
My grandma always said bad things happen in 3. Here is our recent breakdown:
- October 8 Casey loses his job
- October 18 Casey hospitalized for pneumonia
- October 23 I discover Grant has a trigger thumb which will require surgery.He has his first consultation on 11/8
Casey is still so very sick which is making it very hard for him to look for jobs. He went on an interview yesterday and it wiped him out. He has probably lost 15 pounds. He is too sick to do this, but he has to for his family and for himself.
His pride and his immune system have been damaged.
I hate to see him go through this.
So how do I feel…
I am still so angry and shocked that we are in this situation. I am in a constant state of panic attack. I wake up with my heart beating out of my chest. My anxiety is off the charts. Writing this now I feel like I could cry.
This is just such a humbling experience, to watch every penny spent.
I am 30 years old and my mom and dad paid my son's tuition for the month. When I found out that they had done that for me I cried. My parents not only take care of me, but they are now taking care of my kids. It breaks my heart. I am so very thankful, but I can't help but be sad. This is my life.
As I said before I know there is a light at the end of this crappy tunnel. I have to believe that. I know we are going to emerge a better family and couple at the end of this. IT WILL BE OK. I tell myself that, I tell my boys that, I tell my parents that. Now I just have to believe it.
I've missed you, even if your blogs are about lemons right now!! I heart you!
ReplyDeleteYou're absolutely right...you will be okay. And you will all be stronger because of it. I'm super impressed wtih how you are handling it, which is with grace. Big hugs, hang in there.
ReplyDeleteoh girl, what a tough time. I'm confident that God will see you thru this. it's not easy when you're in the midst of the storm, but when it passes, you will be a strong family.
ReplyDeletepraying for you!
First of all, WHAT?! Casey lost his job? What bullshit is this? I will never go to that restaurant again, in a show of solidarity. Assholes.
ReplyDeleteSecondly, if anyone can get through this, it is you. You are a tough, strong, resilient person. I know your family will land on your feet.
Thirdly, I know more than anyone how stressful the months of October and November are for you in any given year, much less with this shit going on. If you need to vent, call me.
Lastly, you are right, it will be ok. It will. Promise. Deep breaths.
-Annie
First time reader from Working Mommy Network. Had to read your blog after seeing the title...My Boys. I also have two little boys, and they are my world! Sorry for everything you are going through...I can relate to losing a job. I was laid off for 8 months back in 2008/2009, and it was a scary time. But...it will be all right. Things seem to have a way of working themselves out. Looking forward to reading your blog going forward.
ReplyDelete